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Capture Your Grief Day 4: Legacy

A great misconception our culture perpetuates is that the longer the life, the greater the legacy, the more valuable the life. This is closely tied to the ugly belief some hold that a child in the womb has no “value” unless the mother wants him or her. But as many post-abortive women eventually realize, even if they did not “want” the tiny life inside them, that baby’s life affected hers. That baby changed someone. He or she left an impression on this world. That baby left a legacy.

As it is with each of us. From the moment of conception, every person leaves an imprint on this world. Even the tiniest of us has a legacy to leave. So, the question becomes what is that legacy and whether we who remain will honor it.

When John Blaise was born, I was, of course, heartbroken. But I was also taken with awe at the amazing perfection of this tiny little boy I held. I had seen pictures of gestational development and of aborted babies his age, but to witness for myself God’s beautiful handiwork through my son truly left me in awe. John left a legacy of my new respect and love for God’s creation.

In my aching and wanting to help others dealing with the same need for healing, I took the opportunity to volunteer to build and maintain a website for Lil Angels Hankies. Through this, John Blaise left a legacy of helping to touch the lives of hundreds of people, and closer to me personally, he led me to some of the best friends I never would have meet otherwise. Oh, and his footprints are on the Lil Angels Hankies logo too, literally.

John Blaise has no doubt left a legacy of having changed me. But his short life touched so many more than my husband’s and mine. Our family drew close to us and, in turn, their lives were changed as well.

Perhaps the change most visible to me on a daily basis is how John has affected the lives of his big brothers. On one hand, it hurts to know these little boys are having to deal with the reality of baby loss at such a young age. It’s not fair that such innocence had been stripped from them. However, I see how John has left his brothers with a legacy of compassion and a greater respect for life. I hope and expect that these boys will have a better, more rounded understanding of how to handle the loss of a baby should they meet someone with a shared experience in the future.

Capture Your Grief day 4: Legacy

Capture Your Grief Day 4: Legacy
shining through his brothers

Now that Alexander has joined John, we are watching his legacy unfold as well. I expect his will be a reinforcement of what John has done through his absence. But who knows how God will use THIS tiny boy’s life to His glory.

But I’m sure he will.


To take part in #captureyourgrief for 2013 visit this link to get all of the information http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/2013/09/capture-your-grief-october-2013.html. To see the facebook event please click here https://www.facebook.com/events/735339813149251/


  1. October 5, 2013    

    You found your words 🙂 And they are poignant and beautiful as always. Thank you, Julie.

  2. Rosemary C. Gray Rosemary C. Gray
    October 5, 2013    

    Julie, your gift with words that reach into the heart and softly stroke emotions is unmatched. Much love to you and yours.

  3. Joyce Ledgerwood Joyce Ledgerwood
    October 6, 2013    

    Wow! What a gift! A BEAUTIFUL gift…you have, you are, you give. Thank You. Love, Mom

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torch bearing quietly

I will not act out, will not
yell or curse or slam doors,
will not make a scene -- you
do not deserve such a chance
to make an example out of me
to be proven right since you
are not. Instead, I'll stand
at this street corner, raise
my hand high and clench that
light which yet remains. It
will burn brightly, quietly,
fiercely before fading as I.

Then I'll be gone but found.

©JAC 2005

Poetry by Julie Ann Cook!

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Love Like Weeds
by Julie Ann Cook
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