poetry • art • marriage • momhood • faith

two sisters

our differences still catch me off guard

So, my 24-year-old sister is expecting. They were married in October and she is now expecting and due January 3rd or 4th. For most people, that’s still considered jumping into parenthood quickly. But she and her husband, both more “by the book” Catholics than most, have been trying to get pregnant for months. Since before they were married, she has been going to doctors, knowing something was funky with her hormones. She’s been on supplements, gotten injections, and after plenty of trying and doctor visits, they’ve conceived. But today, she emailed me, rightly worried: her progesterone has dropped significantly, which, in a worst-case scenario could suggest a coming miscarriage.

My stomach turns with empathy, but, I’m at ease that she and the baby will be fine.

Still, I find the whole situation has a certain kind of irony: they, the couple who can afford the big family they want, may only be given one or two children after lots of prayer and trying. Meanwhile, “fertile myrtle” that I am, I’m afraid of thinking of sex for fear of having to support another child yet.

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torch bearing quietly

I will not act out, will not
yell or curse or slam doors,
will not make a scene -- you
do not deserve such a chance
to make an example out of me
to be proven right since you
are not. Instead, I'll stand
at this street corner, raise
my hand high and clench that
light which yet remains. It
will burn brightly, quietly,
fiercely before fading as I.

Then I'll be gone but found.

©JAC 2005

Poetry by Julie Ann Cook!

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Love Like Weeds
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