poetry • art • marriage • momhood • faith

A Married Woman’s Crushes

Somewhere inside, lives the teeny-bopper I never was.

To start, I have always been a late bloomer. I mean, despite the fact that I had a “boyfriend” in preschool (Georgie was a red-head…), and “dated” the same guy from 6th grade through sometime my senior year (because we looked cute together), I really didn’t have a honest-to-goodness irrational-infatuational crush until almost two months after I was married.

Scratch that. Of course, I had a crush on my husband before I married him, … and before that I had a crush on that other guy… and that guy who dumped me in college… and the guy I had to break up with to date my now-husband…

What I meant to say was “crush on a celebrity.”

I didn’t care about the New Kids on the Block, or… I don’t know who else girls had crushes on then. Oh, yeah, didn’t gush for David Ducovony either, unlike one of my best friends, an X-File head.

I didn’t care.

They were distant beings from another world. They still are. There was no reason to lust after them, not even in the pink-bubblegum-teeny-b way.

Enter “Pirates of the Caribbean” and Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow.

Now, at nearly 27, I’m one with the masses of 12-year-olds.

I bring this up because Mr. Depp is on the cover of June’s Rolling Stone… and… well… really, he’s hot.

That and my husband suggested going to see Pirates 3 at the opening midnight showing this Thursday night, which I’d jump at except that… it seems wrong.

Thursday is our anniversary.

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torch bearing quietly

I will not act out, will not
yell or curse or slam doors,
will not make a scene -- you
do not deserve such a chance
to make an example out of me
to be proven right since you
are not. Instead, I'll stand
at this street corner, raise
my hand high and clench that
light which yet remains. It
will burn brightly, quietly,
fiercely before fading as I.

Then I'll be gone but found.

©JAC 2005

Poetry by Julie Ann Cook!

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Love Like Weeds
by Julie Ann Cook
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